White crayon on the white paper...

A smile can hide a thousand tears

He'll Never Know

I want to run, I want to hide.
From all the pain he caused inside.
I want to scream, I want to cry.
Why can't I tell him Goodbye?

I want to move on, I just can't let go.
I love him more than he will ever know.
I want to start over, I want to feel free!
But this pain will never leave me be.

He hurt me bad, the pain is deep.
From all the promises he couldn't keep.
All the lies, I heard him say.
Are in my head and just won't fade.

How can I forget him, leave the him behind.
Erase the memories from my mind.
He doesn't love me, and he never will.
He will never care, how I feel.

Its not easy to let go someone that had been in your heart for years. The presence and love never actually touch the heart. Then all the words you said to me just another lies from you..

You will never know how it feels when heard you talking about other girls. How u love her and how she meant everything to you.

You will never know how it feels when every words I responded to you slowly killing me inside. To encourage you to go to her.

You will never know how it feels when I said "I'm happy for you" yet when I turn around tear after tear went down my cheek.

You will never know how it feels when you just have to put a smile on the face and laugh on the jokes when deep inside everything scatterred. Turn into thousand small pieces that never be the same again.

You will never know how it feels when I knew that you're unhappy and heart broken, automatically my tears dropped and feel the same like you.

But among all, you will ever know how it feels when you'd been treat like a friend after all the years and effort you put to get the heart. Never more than that. Benn around you and act like nothing is wrong while I should avoid you till the end. 

People said, loving a person that doesn't love you back is like hugging a cactus, the tighter you hold on to it, the more it hurts. I guess I am that stupid girl that will have hard time letting you go. No matter how much I love you, I must hate you. But no matter how hard I try, I ends up being around you again. Then become hurt again and will forever be that stupid girl..

*I don't know why I write this. Read it again, I feels how pathetic I am right now. But it is  way to ease the burden in my heart. 

Please tell me why....!!!